Monday, September 29, 2008

One of Us Now

The first 24 hours back have been wonderful. With tears welling up, I say WONDERFUL! I've spent most of this time watching Samuel's expressions, wondering what he is thinking, and amazed at how he seems right at home with his new brothers and sisters.

Our time in Moscow was mostly pleasant, but the last two days were more difficult than the first three. As we mentioned before Samuel began testing us. Obviously missing familiarity, he started biting, kicking and screaming. From what we know, all very normal responses. He also decided one of those days he was not going to drink anything, and he hardly ate that day either. To most mothers this is a true test of patience. Again, God was near and gave us and Samuel the endurance to get through the last leg of our journey. And no he didn't starve in the process. Ryan and I learned so much and really remained a tight team the entire trip. But now we had come to the hardest part, getting a resistant, frustrated, sad toddler home who had no understanding of the great things that lay at the finish line. To be honest it did cross my mind (for a split second) that maybe the sacrifice had been too great, and for a child who doesn't even seem to like us! Ryan mentioned, in the midst of one tantrum, how it seemed Samuel was so softened and sweet after each of his crying fits and ready to be loved. So true, I thought. There was a reward for our tired arms in the end. This reminded me of how often I kick and scream and throw a fit (well it looks more like a pout in the corner in my case) when God is leading me in a different way than I want to be led! Oh, how gracious God is to be patient with me and love me through my ugliest moments because he knows that where He is leading will be best for me. Because He loves me, He is faithful to mature me, through difficult circumstances. And He has rewards and blessings waiting for me when I am softened and sweet!

We spent roughly 16 hours in the air to get from Moscow to Frankfurt and then to San Francisco on Friday. Samuel did really well and even slept for 7 of those hours! We stayed the night in San Fransisco to recover before our short flight home on Saturday. When we arrived we were greeted by our family and a few close friends with big grins, holding balloons and snapping pictures. As we got close, Noah could no longer contain himself and ran out past security to see us. It was so fun to see his excitement over his new brother. I pray they will share a special bond! Taylor, Lauren, and Makenna were equally excited and we were so glad to be able to hug and kiss them again. Cousins made a welcome home sign and special cards. The grandma's and sister in law had prepared good dinner and stocked our frig. They know just how to take care of us! All went above and beyond the call of duty! Thank you to those of you who paid close attention to our story, prayed for us each step of the way, and cheered us homeward! I have a renewed appreciation for my home. Not my house (although it's nice too) but the family and friends the Lord has blessed me with.

When we were still in Russia and it was just the three of us, Ryan and I tried hard to imagine how it would be to have Samuel a regular part of our family. And now after just the first day, we can't imagine our family without him. He is sleeping in his new room with his big brother Noah who has been SO proud to show him the ropes. He keeps repeating to me, "I'm a good boy". Confidence is not his weakness. Taylor has successfully taught him how to shoot his Nerf gun and how to pretend to be injured. He keeps saying how cute his little smile and quiet laugh is. Lauren's mothering instincts have kicked in and she loves to help him up the stairs and wants to learn Russian words to communicate better. She is very gentle with him and he really has latched on to her and seems to know she is the compassionate one! Makenna enjoyed playing kitchen with Samuel yesterday and is so tickled when he wants to give her a hug. She says, "mom he keeps putting his forehead and nose right close to mine". With those cheeks, who wouldn't want kisses. I'm sure it's the honeymoon phase, but all the kids are being so generous with their time with him and want to wait on him constantly. The discussion about who will sit next to Samuel this morning at breakfast was cute.

We are surprised at how much more Samuel is eating now that we are home. This makes my heart happy 'cause I wasn't sure how much longer he could survive on strawberry yogurt and baby fruit in a jar. Yesterday he even enjoyed some tri-tip. He is pleased with all the toys in his closet and is smiling more and more. The house looks like a tornado hit, but we will get to that later. Eventually life will return to "normal" but for now we are enjoying the newness and a little fun chaos. Yes, for now those do go together. I know the pictures are more interesting than my words. I will post some soon when I have a chance to look through them.

56 comments:

Anonymous said...

This Grandpa was pleased beyond my wildest imagination at the arrival of our newest grandchild. He is all that we saw on the video, photo's and more. I tried to stand back and observe the moments and was struck by the personnel at the terminal (FAX) and other passengers that seemed to stop and and wonder at what was taking place, this couple with a small boy getting such a wonderful reception from a large group of people. My thoughts were that the passengers had observed them in flight and may have figured out that Samuel was adopted. The security staff was especially attentive since one of ours had crashed thier perimeter (Noah). As I noticed that the security detail was watching so closely, I approached them and asked if they knew our story, they didn't but one indicated they she had seen such a reception a couple years back, I asked could it have been three years ago and she said yes since the similarities were so close. With great pride I told them our story of both adoptions. We have accepted Sanuel as our own and anticipate knowing and loving him through eternity.
Welcome home Ryan, Allyson and Samuel we love you very much.
Papa and Grandma Howard

Anonymous said...

God is good!
Love,
Jenny Ratzlaff

candice said...

Yay- I'm glad you got a moment to update everyone! I love how you included lots of the details of these first days home. Now where's Tamara with those pictures?!

We are so in love with sweet Samuel already, even though he doesn't quite know what to think of us yet and we anticipate him warmimg up to us more and more each time we're around. Hope you enjoyed your dinner!
Candice

Anonymous said...

**impatiently** waiting for an update!! It's been fun to tag-along on your journey and I cannot wait to hear more about how things are going!

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